BPD or EUPD is more about Environment Growing Up


BPD is not something wrong with the Brain Physically 
BPD is more about environment & family of origin when I was a little one and
 Learned Behaviour.
   This is where our Belief System is/was created.   
My BPD diagnosis happened after Character Defects have had a chance to play out. 
 I was in my early 50's when a Psychiatrist informed me of his diagnosis.

 Just to name a few of my issues

  • Relationships Problems - many marriages 
  • Self Harm -  Suicide attempts
  • Anger issues
  • Addictive Behaviour 
  • Low Self-Esteem - Low Self-Trust
  • Trust issues with others
  • Isolation
  • Poor Self-Talk
  • Workaholic
  • Codependant 
  • I did not know how to be a friend, hence did not have long term friendships 

There can also be a family history of mental illness, which complicates matters/diagnosis. 
Hence all the labels & medications that doctors give to me.

In my opinion the first question for BPD 
is 
Family of Origin and their History.  
How did I/we/you get to be BPD
For all of us, our family has a large impact on who we are, our values, our belief systems, and how we view ourselves. This initial socialization and the bonds created will often have
an impact far beyond childhood. When this childhood was involved trauma or other issues, then it can be seen as a family of origin issue.

 Other Peoples Behaviour that were molded to me/little one that helped to create my Belief System. Here are just some of the Learned Belief System Messages that may have contributed to the disorder/learned behaviour. 

  • I learn about and how to or not to interact with People, Family, Friends, Co-workers, Animals.....
  • I did Not feeling Heard & Still feel Unheard in my Family
  • Felt misunderstood & Still feel Unheard in my Family
  • I was the Black Sheep and the Escape Goat
  • Did Not get positive messages about self 
  • Tried hard to gain approval with no avail
  • Many Broken Promises, Lies
  • When I felt good about something did someone tell you not good enough
  • When I did ask to learn parents had no time ever to share/teach me.  Yet, they would teach others
  • I did not get loving, nurturing, support 
  • I did not have good role models to interact with
    • Family
    • Friends
    • Work or Coworkers 
    • Being in Society
  • My home address was not static or consistent
  • Parents always changing jobs
  • There was Substances Abuse/Addictive Behaviour in my home
  • Physical Abuse to me, my siblings & fighting/physical abuse between you parents
  • There was Emotional and Mental Abuse 

I was broken and did not want to perpetuat the poor learned behaviour to my Children.

Parents are supposed create a Safe Nurturing Environment.  They are our Examples of how we are supposed to be in life.  It is like we are the carbon copy of them and the cycle continues.

 Personal Note:

I started this blog to educate myself and have a place to refer back to in the future.  This blog is a reference tool not to replace a doctor 

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